Raw Is Halloween 10-31-11

I may have no idea what is going on tonight during Raw. I had a hard time sleeping on Friday night and had one last hurrah for my about-to-be brother-in-law as we celebrated his bachelor party. We started out at a Dallas Stars game and then ended up somewhere at a Dick’s Last Resort in downtown Dallas. There was a fan at the Dallas Stars game dressed as John Cena. He was booed every time he walked past a group of adults.

I am running on a lot of sleep deprivation. And random brats are going to be knocking on my door asking for free candy. If Raw gets really bad tonight, I may find myself plugging in Night of the Living Dead and blogging on that instead.

The Rock was there in a pre-recorded statement. Yawn… I hate to say this, but it was a pretty good pre-recorded promo. I’m sure the crowd must have been happy to pay to watch a pre-recorded statement.

Our first match was Punk and Henry. Johnny Ace came out and reminded us of who he was I guess… to see if fans would tune out earlier. Alberto del Rio sent in the Mexican Paul Bearer (Ricardo Rodriguez) to interfere and keep Punk from winning. My wife compared to Alberto del Rio to a Mexican Superman. I think she was on to something. Punk sent Rodriguez back into the ring and he got attacked by Henry. Are we building up Del Rio-Henry?

We get the Muppets on Monday Night Raw. I just wrote that. Then we get the Human Muppet Vickie Guerrero. I gotta admit I loved Vickie and Miss Piggy. Santino came out to their rescue. The highlight was Kermit calling Vickie his mother. The other highlight was Santino was calling him John Laryngitis. Then Kelly Kelly came out and made out with Kermit. It even made my wife laugh.

There was a Divas costume battle royal. Alicia Fox won the costume contest for me. Eve won the match.

Then we had a skit with Bunsen and Beaker where Christian bullied him. (Remember, Christian. Nobody likes a bully.) Then my Halloween costume Sheamus came to his rescue. They are related. Cute.

We had AirBoom take on Cody Rhodes and Wade Barrett which made no sense. Cody Rhodes got a nice crowd reaction. They won for absolutely no reason. Then Christian comes in which calls on the mobilization of Team Pasty White.

Then Statler and Waldorf did the “What?” stuff. Cute. I’ll just skip over the Johnny Ace segment. It looked like Weekend at Bernie’s with Punk trying to carry the deadweight.

We got Big Show versus Alberto del Rio. The crowd had no reaction whatsoever, but it was a nice dramatic match. It made sense for Show-ADR. The crowd was dead and couldn’t care less. Big Show won like he hadn’t pinned the champ. I’ve been trying to look at this positively, but this has been a pretty awful first hour.

Punk comes out and sits in the ring and puts him in the Anaconda Vice until he agreed to a match at Survivor Series. Then we had Fozzie and Gonzo. Swagger and Ziggler twisted Gonzo. Swagger really has no presence.

Then it was time for the Swagger-Santino match. The work was fine. I’m tiring of Swagger. Beaker gave Santino a blue liquid he spit on Swagger. He pinned him.

Zack Ryder had Dolph Ziggler. I think the match was well-booked. I was just so turned off by this whole night. Ryder won.

We had no HHH tonight which was an improvement to me. I fast forwarded Michael Cole just because I refuse to watch a human being get treated that way.

Miz and Cena were the main event. It was a pretty decent match. Cena won.

Well, Raw was pretty awful tonight. I enjoyed a lot of the Muppet segments. While we had no HHH, it was riddled with nothing but the same tired cliches. I can name 3 people almost immediately who need off the tv NOW. Not a lot of hope after this week’s episode.

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